You know the scariest part about having an enormous potential?
Reaching it.
What if I reach my goal weight and am super ugly? What if I go to UCLA Film and don't get a job after graduation? What if I write the book, get it published, and only three people read it?
Such thoughts have been plaguing me. Charlie Brown put it best, "There is no heavier burden than great potential." Poor lad was right. The higher the pedestal, the farther the fall. Cliche cliche, blah blah. My mind is slowly wrapping itself around the fact that even if I am hideous ugly as a skinny person, or I don't get a job in the film industry, it's okay. That's the point when I move on to find a new dream. (Although the whole being ugly thing wouldn't be that easy to swallow.)
I'm still in the deranged mindset that I can do anything I want to - that I'm capable of anything. I don't think I ever want to let that go, but it's a bit of a blow to the system when I fail. It's a big blow, actually, seeing as I'm supposed to be omnipotent. Isn't it a bit weird that we spend our adolescence learning about the world, and only on the brink of adulthood do we start learning about ourselves?
On the plus side, I have discovered a superpower I possess: I can put children to sleep. Have a crying baby? I'll take care of that. Johnny won't go down for a nap? Give him here. I'm magical!
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